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Faults, facts and fun

Arati Gurung


So I was playing the ‘stare’ game with my man one fine sunny afternoon and like always I lost as I blinked first. Trying to defend my defeat, I explained it could be because I have smaller eyes than him and he just ruffled my hair and changed the topic. But like many other women, the issue kept revolving in my head. My man was now talking about something; I think it was about bats and balls – maybe Cricket. And the good girlfriend that I am, I listened patiently with half of me at the table and the other half in deep thought (we women are capable of doing that you know - we’re made for multitasking!).I was determined to find an explanation to my loss – one that would make him crinkle up that cute forehead of his and shake his head of beautiful hair and say “Why, yes sweetheart you’re right, that must be the reason, otherwise there’s no way you could have lost. If it were up to you, you would have definitely won!”

 
So in search of the answer, I put my question forward to my great Guru, Google. After doing the necessary, Guru gave me the answer – ‘women blink twice as many times as men do’! I now wait for another Stare game so that I can lose and tell my man why women aren’t that good at that particular game. Come to think of it that could be the reason why men find ‘staring’ at things - their favorite pastime.

 
Meanwhile, let me share with you a couple of human facts that can come in handy as excuses for (God knows) the thousands of things we have to go though everyday.

 

  • If you missed something your honey said after dinner, tell her it’s because –‘After eating too much, our hearing is less sharp’.
  • If he tells you your hair looks dull and dry, tell him that ‘Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair’.
  • If your girl finds you drooling on a hot babe, tell her that ‘The average human produces 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime’. One has got to do something useful with all that saliva right?
  • If your man finds you dreaming about the muscles on another man, clearly explain to him that ‘Thinking about your muscles can make you stronger’, and didn’t he always want you to be a strong girl?
  • If she says you appear shorter than usual, tell her it’s because ‘Humans are about 1 cm taller in the morning than in the evening, as the layers of cartilage in the joints gets compressed during the day’ (whatever that means! She won’t ask anyway, so don’t sweat!).
  • If your man finds you showing ‘the finger’ to anyone you just can’t stand, defend your ladylike manners by telling him you were checking on your nail as ‘The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger’.

 

Go ahead and store the facts in your memory, even if your partner doesn’t fall for it, there will surely be laughs and we all know that laughter in a relationship signals good times ahead! Cheers!

 
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